NUMBSKULLS: Charges After Incident At Rahm Security HQ

Baez gives us some duck lips. (Cook Co. Sheriff)

Edwin Torres and Maria Baez are the two knuckleheads who were arrested early Thursday morning after cops allegedly saw them breaking into vehicles at Mayor Rahm Emanuel’s security detail headquarters.

Police say Ms. Baez went the extra mile on Stupidity Road by battering an officer who confronted the pair.

Baez, charged with aggravated battery and burglary, is held on $75,000 bond. Torres faces a felony burglary charge. He’s held on $25,000 bail.

Torres. (Cook Co. Sheriff)

Torres and Baez were arrested near Irving Park Road and Damen shortly after the alleged crimes, which took place at an old firehouse in the 1700 block of Byron.

Emanuel lives about three blocks from the firehouse, which the police department established as his security headquarters shortly after his election as mayor.

The dimwitted duo lives nearby in the 4300 block of Winchester.

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CWBChicago was created in 2013 by five residents of Wrigleyville and Boystown who had grown disheartened with inaccurate information that was being provided at local Community Policing (CAPS) meetings. Our coverage area has expanded since then to cover Lincoln Park, River North, The Loop, Uptown, and other North Side Areas. But our mission remains unchanged: To provide original public safety reporting with better context and greater detail than mainstream media outlets. Our editorial email address is